This World Cup Has Been Co-opted By Dr. Seuss

Dennis Ryan Chicago Advertising Element 79

It’s the talk of the Cup this year.  Everyone’s debating the impact of the vuvuzela: that cheap plastic horn South American football fans started blowing at matches years ago.  It’s ruining the beautiful game…  It’s distracted the French team…  It’s made millions worry needlessly about their satellite reception…

The vuvuzela is a simple noisemaker: you just purse your lips, make a buzz and the meter long horn amplifies that to a monotonous, locust-esque drone that hits well over 100 decibels, a level critics charge can lead to permanent noise-induced hearing loss.

Frankly, I don’t have an opinion on the Vuvuzela aside from saying if I didn’t have context, “Vuvuzela” would make a lovely name for a niece.  That said, lots of people do have an opinion, and few of them are positive.

But that too may be a matter of context.  The big complainers are North American fans and candidly, we’re kind of new to this whole thing.  Of course that horn’s irritating and stupid, but it’s their tradition.  And it’s been their game for a lot longer than we’ve made it ours.

But more to the point–this country has always led the world based on our can-do, problem-solving, Yankee spirit.  So I ask you; if we can create a yellow electronic first down marker for our football telecasts, why can’t someone create a noise-canceling application for our World Cup telecasts?

Somebody get on that.  Meanwhile, I’m watching Celtics-Lakers…

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By Dennis Ryan, CCO, Element 79

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Nate says:

It sounds like a swarm of bees. Which would be very distracting if I was trying to score a goal. But, I’m not gonna lie. I’ve never been a fan of soccer or wanted to play because of all the running.

While playing high school baseball I was a pitcher and was DHed for. Jogging to and from the mound was all the running I did.

As a junior high point guard, I pulled up for 3 pointers and immediately jogged backwards to defend. I missed a lot.

But to get back to the Vuvuzela. I have more difficulty with “stoppage time” and ending a game in a tie. There’s always the mute button.